Random Thoughts 2

Random thoughts on game plots, stories, and plays.
The Hero/ine:
    - Usually completely oblivious until some "thing" tells him/her, and usually denies the role. Then completely got involved and ignores all facts of life just because.
    - Usually emo, or crazy.
    - Carries 6932 items around, including 60 swords, 9 types of bows (no, not arrows, they are expensive,) 600 completely random objects, 6 rocks, and 4 gold bricks and still walks around with ease.
    - Doesn't get hungry, EVER.
    - Picks up food from random strangers and knocked over garbage bins.
    - Hellbent on not jumping over a 3 feet wall, despite higher than normal strength and dexterity, but will gladly jump down a 600 feet cliff to a gruesome death.
    - Takes about 600 bullets, 60 sword through the heart, and 5 chops in the head to kill.
    - or dies stepping on an ant, or walking into a door.

The companions:
    - Usually do most of the work and let the hero takes all the credits while they fade back into the unknown.
    - Swarm around the hero, or form a neat line behind the hero, or worse, hermit <i>inside</i> the hero.
    - Often state the complete obvious details of the environment.
    - First to headbutt into conflict to get hurt, only to create <i>more</i> of a hassle for the hero to fight.
    - mostly useless in fights.
    - major source of discouraging advice.
    - Usually imperative to yell the name of the spell when using said spell.
    - When companion offers to do something, usually screwing it up, BADLY.

The Villain:
    - Overly confident, despite the hero killing all of his minions and every single guard in his hideout.
    - Never, EVER sends powerful troops to overwhelm the hero when the hero is still weak.
    - Only acts when the hero has matured and more than a match (root the source, eh?)
    - usually stops expanding his influence as soon as the hero started exploring, instead just sits and does absolutely nothing.
    - has a tendency to not send more than 2 bosses at a time.
    - usually takes about 58432908 hits to die.

The national army:
    - completely useless.

The NPCs:
    - Stand around the same spot for eternity.
    - Have little concerns for home security.
    - Will tell you the same thing over, and over again.
    - Gets in the way.

The Creatures:
    - usually carry spare change of the relevant currency, despite of their size. Sometimes they have weapons inside their bodies.
    - groups neatly from weak creatures to strong creatures.
    - always attacks the hero, and just the hero; never attacks NPCs unless told to do so.

The Environment:
    - A locked door is mostly invulnerable to all damage, despite you shooting at it with a thermal nuclear device.
    - will have something to block you from the next step. Anything, including an NPC you can kill in 1 hit.